winter is coming??


seasonal essentials,
in case that fun blustery weather ever does show up

Despite the 80 degree weather in the confusingly sunny state of Georgia, I AM READY FOR WINTER DAMMIT.

Black Friday + general seasonal excitement + the solution to my search for the perfect pair of flare jeans = these winter favorites I am determined to wear all season despite temperature or occasional appropriateness.

1. Madewell Flea Market Flares
To hold your gut, hide your leg hair, & showcase your ass. ALL IN ONE.
Note: J. Crew & Madewell pants run large so I got them a size small.

2. Ralph Lauren COTTON Cable Knit Sweater
Because wool, acrylic, etc. make me itch & Ralph is the king of cotton. Bless him.

3. A Funky Thrifted Turtleneck
Paisley or tacky holiday prints are preferable.

4. The Reformation Avalon Bodysuit in Blue Velvet
Wear it out, wear it to bed, wear it to your grandma's for Christmas dinner! They can't exactly put you at the kids' table with this thing on.

5. The Reformation Wolfe Coat in Ridge
Very unnecessary in 80 degree weather, but very necessary for soft, cuddly, ECO-FRIENDLY happiness year-round!

6. Chinese Laundry heeled booties (similar here)
Chunky heels ftw. Sassier, more comfortable, and they still provide a lovely booty lift without making you wobble & trip as much as regular heels. 

7. Lots & lots of deodorant
I am SO committed to winter wear. But it's 80 effing degrees y'all. 

Optional accessories: leg shaving, underwear of any kind, fireball-spiked apple cider, red lipstick, a furry, Oscar-the-Grouch-approved vest, and a pair of adidas fuckboi sandals to change into when your heeled boots start to hurt. 

Also, a short flared skirt to (kind of) cover your bottom half while wearing said bodysuit. I honestly couldn't find mine while we were taking pictures for this & it was my first time wearing it sans pants in the great outdoors. I felt sexy & free.

Below is the man whose dog was very interested in witnessing me being sexy & free & covered in tinsel. He kept pulling the dog leash & saying "Come on, Fido, they're doing something right now..."


PS - Does anyone else have a hard time understanding that winter technically starts December 21 and ends March 21?
I obviously did not pay attention to this in school. I get very confused when it's not freezing in December and then it is freezing in February. Starting my Christmas preparations in August and looking at Spring-Summer 2016 collections in September may also have something to do with this issue.

PPS - Catie took these pictures, of course, & in the ones we forced an unenthusiastic friend to take of the two of us, she's wearing fabulous glitter pants from Boohoo.