the city of demons? part i

Los Angeles. It's been on my mind since this time last year. I don’t remember where the idea came from or when, but day by day I became sure that I needed to move west. My parents took me to California once when I was little but I didn’t remember a thing about it. Regardless of my ignorance, I have become obsessed with the idea of living in the Golden State. Beau & Tavis, masterminds behind News To Me and two of the people I admire most, made the move last fall and I was dangerously envious. I couldn’t wait to be out of school, out of the South, and having my own adventure. I’ve been telling my mother I want to get out of here and move to a big city since I was about 5 years old. 17 years later, I figure it’s about damn time.

When I visited in March, I was amazed and overwhelmed and I loved it. It was harsher than I expected but through all the surprise car rental fees, towing tickets, missed flights, extremely unhelpful Spirit Airlines gate workers, and traffic, traffic, traffic, I just kept thinking, “This is where I need to be. I’m not going to let this city kill me.” Reminder to self: Don’t park downtown after 4. Or make friends with all the meter maids. They've got to have some sort of mob-like system, right? We'll see.

I think I put off writing this post because I was avoiding all the emotions that came with the trip. Maybe it would've been better to move out there with no idea what I was getting myself into. To keep my delusions alive and imagine that everything in the sunny state of California was beachy and happy and easy. But I think I needed to face the reality of the West Coast’s version of the city that never sleeps (seriously, there is traffic at any hour of the day or night. afternoon or evening. witching hour. power hour. ~golden hour~. you name it, there's traffic). Because if you want your dreams to stop being dreams, you follow them. Even - and especially - when it’s tough.

So after many a second guess and a backup plan and an extended fret about money (Do they take Monopoly money in La La Land? Probably should've invested in bitcoins...), I am still Cali-bound. Come hell or high water. I’m not giving up. And now my emotional vomit is over so check back soon for what I did while I was there.